Familiar

As I was preparing for devotions at volleyball the other night, I pulled a book off my shelf to see if there was anything I could find quickly to take to devotions.  I know, I know…I should have spent more time…I should have been better prepared…I should have…But I didn’t.  Instead, God led me to a book I read last year by Francis Chan titled Crazy Love.  Now, I will usually plow through a book fairly quickly and throw it on my shelf without remembering a lot of what I read.  Not something I am bragging about, but it happens.  Then, the books will sit on my shelf never to be read again.  They may be loaned out but only if my name is in the cover.  That way, they can be returned to me to gather dust on my shelf the way they are supposed to!

But, I really believe that in my distractedness and my hurry Monday night, God put this book back in my hand.  Because, as I opened it up, I was intrigued by the first chapter’s title, “Stop Praying”.  Now, this is an odd first chapter for a book written by a pastor.  So, I began to read again the first chapter of this book, and I was blown away by what God was showing me.

I need to quit praying…the way I have been praying.  I need to quit going to God with my prayer checklist.  My prayers, have become, “God, help me.  Help them.  Feed them.  Heal them.  Heal me.  Lead me.  Lead them.  Give me a sign.  Comfort them.  And, oh yeah, by the way, I love you.  InJesusnameamen!”  I have become the master of the speed prayer.  I mean, come on, God doesn’t want my food to get cold.  Does He?

After I read that Chapter for the second time, I went to the book’s website and watched the 2 minute video for Chapter 1.  You can watch it here:  http://crazylovebook.com/videos_chapter.html

In this video, Francis talks about people not believing that the beautiful woman they see him with is actually his wife.  He talks about looking at a picture of the himself and his wife and trying to be objective about whether or not she looked too good for him.  He came to the same conclusion that I did when I thought about this.  Like Francis’ wife, my wife is WAY to beautiful (inside and out) to be married to some schmuck like me.  But, I spend most of my life not thinking about this fact.  I mean, she’s “just my wife”, “my other half”, etc.

Why do I take her beauty, poise, and grace for granted?  Because she is familiar.  Because she is there every day.  Because she is a woman of her word, and I know she is not going anywhere (homely husband or not).  Sometimes I think familiarity brings complacency.

And, I am beginning to wonder if I am becoming too familiar with God.  I mean, I read about Him every day.  I talk to Him every day.  Notice I didn’t say talk WITH Him.  I have become too accustomed to the awesome and powerful God who created everything I see including this beautiful woman who sleeps next to me every night and puts up with me every day!  Why do I come to Him with a list of wants and not take the time to marvel at what He has already given me?  Why don’t I take the time to just stand in front of Him mouth agape in childlike awe of who He is?  Why do I think I know all about Him?  How can I be so arrogant?

God, break me of this familiarity that breeds comfort.  You are so much bigger and greater than I ever give you credit for.  And yet, I treat you like a slot machine in the sky that I can just make by request, insert a small dose of inJesusname and wait for the jackpot.  You give to me because you are a good Father not, necessarily, because I am a good son.  And, I thank you for that.  Please continue to put books and people in front of me that challenge me.  Thank you for reaching out and lovingly smacking me as I grabbed, in haste, for anything that would work for a quick volleyball devotion.  You directed me to something that is still messing with me days later.  Thanks for loving me enough to not leave me where you found me!  I love you!

Amen.

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